This was my 20th year in a row exhibiting in Small Press at San Diego Comic-Con, in pretty much the exact same spot (yes, I’m including the last two “virtual” comic-cons). Being behind the Cool Jerk table once again was like muscle memory, although there were subtle differences that apparently evolved over the past three years. For example, the exhibit hall floors lost a LOT of their temporary carpeting, the security detail had changed hands from Elite to some other service, you can no longer roll your cargo into or out of the exhibit hall (they instead want you to carry your hundreds of pounds of merchandise from the concourse across 20 yards of lobby carpet into the exhibit hall), several mainstay exhibitors (eg. DC, Dark Horse) were no-shows for whatever reasons, and cosplay seemed to be about half as prevalent as usual.

The only new product Darlene and I had at the table was our collaboration, 88 Hours— Lost and Scared, a full-color graphic novella documenting the five-day span that our doggo Doctor was missing due to a negligent pet-sitter. Many people knew the story already, having watched it unfold live on social media back in 2018, but to see it illustrated and packed with additional information was a totally new experience. The San Diego Union-Tribune thought our story was compelling enough to publish a column about it/us, as did Times of San Diego (and a hilarious site run by a robot). We’ve received a lot of great feedback — some of it emotional — and we think it’s a contender when awards season comes around. Each book is pawtographed by Doctor and you can get a copy (or two) via my Cool Jerk store, here!

Now, on with the show!

How things look a couple days before the show.

Here we are at the table, with longtime friend and comic-con bon vivant Dennis Schamp dropping in!

Let’s get to the cosplay. Here’s Beetlejuice (Mindy Conley) and Stimpy.

Excellent Rogue from the X-Men: Evolution cartoon.

The lovely Nadja (my buddy Sandra Krombacher) taking a rare day trip out of the shadows. She slayed me.

It’s not all about the cosplay, tho. It’s also about capitalism! Aw, who’s the best boy? YOU are…!

Definitely a must-have for any kitchen.

A lovely print with a bonus Kumi Mizuno in the corner (thanks, Darlene!).

Almost bought it.

OK back to the cosplay. In related news, here’s Dr. Doom…

…and Reed Richards.

And here’s Reed and Doom, clearly variants from another timeline since they’re not at each others’ throats.

All hail! Prince Namor of Atlantis is in attendance. Imperius Rex!

Kate and Clint— Hawkeyes.

Did you think Rawhide Kid? Kid Colt? Nope— Two-Gun Kid.

I’ve seen Hela before… but Surtur? That’s a first!

Richard Rider (Nova) stopped by. His helmet’s eyes light up with the power of the Worldmind OF COURSE.

Not the first Sailor Moonknight I saw (there were at least three on the floor), but this one is the best.

In related news, here’s the aforementioned Sailor Moonknight in her Jake Lockley identity, along with a couple long-time Cool Jerk allies (they’re most certainly seen in my previous comic-con photo wrap-ups).

Hey, has anyone seen my Wookie co-pilot? I wish I could find him in this crowd.

Best use of masks we saw.

A gaggle of Spidey rogues (and Peter Porker in the back, likely attempting a sneak attack).

Doctor Strange variant from Earth 92111 has entered the chat.

Unused clip from “Spider-Man: No Way Home”(2021)??

Best for last— crossplay Disney villains Hook, Prince John, Gaston and Hades. *chefs kiss*

 

San Diego Comic-Con International is back for reals this year. I say “for reals” because the last two summers SDCCI had to do things virtual, and their mini-convention in Nov. 2021 wasn’t really much of an affair. But hey, the pandemic is over, right?? So you’ll see Darlene and me in Small Press as we’ve been every year since 2003, table K-9.

And if that isn’t a perfect segue, I don’t know what is!

This year we’re debuting a new book: 88 Hours— Lost and Scared. (Or 88 Hours if you’re nasty.) It’s an off-brand format with an off-brand true story of our dog, Doctor, and how he went missing over five days due to a negligent pet sitter. It’s an emotional, multimedia tale filled with twists, turns and surprises, and luckily a happy ending. We’ve been fulfilling pre-convention orders all week and if you’re not able to make it to SDCC in person, you can order one online at the Cool Jerk store. The book is 32 pages, full color and retails for $10 ($1 of each sale goes to A Way Home For Dogs, a local charity run by Babs Fry, who played an instrumental role in 88 Hours).

We’re exceptionally proud of this book and, not gonna lie, it took more than two years to complete due to PTSD. Look for a write-up in The San Diego Union-Tribune this week!

Beyond 88 Hours, the Cool Jerk table will largely be populated with all the familiar products and publications, including:

• All Cool Jerk collections — Hodabeast, Chickadoowa, Bimboozled and Thinkulus — and Doc Splatter Ominous Omnibus. Get ’em signed by yours truly!

• The Mightily Marvelous Cool Jerk Fun Book! It’s my first all-ages product, if you can believe that. *looks through archive, believes it* It’s a magazine-sized laugh-maker filled with puzzles, games, mazes and other fun stuff. A mere $7.

• Like, For Shore! The Complete Works. It’s three volumes collecting more than 170 college-era strips that preceded Cool Jerk. Armpit, Puppy and the rest of the Spittle Beach gang are all there, and I remastered nearly every strip in graphite. The first printing is in a very limited run of 75 signed-and-numbered copies, and most are gone. Sold as a set, $18.

• Canvas Panels are here for $15 a pop, or $40 if you want a long-form canvas (contains a whole strip, not just one panel), which I can custom-make for you if you order one up in person or online.

• Cool Jerk Enamel Pins. They’re $10 and you get one-of-a-kind original art with each pin. Choose among the COOL word balloon, JERK thought balloon and/or the ubiquitous CENSORED bar… perfect for any jacket, backpack or tongue piercing!

Attendees will also find The Girl Who Kicked The Donut Habit (Darlene’s second comic) and the Jerkopædia (Official Style Guide to Cool Jerk), both of which I’ll have on hand in limited supply. Also running a bit low on T-shirts, but I’ll bring what I have.

And last but not least, here’s a convenient map I whipped up while getting my second Moderna booster.

Hope to see you at the show! Wear a mask and stay safe!

This year, the “con crud” could kill you

Due to Covid-19, San Diego Comic-Con had to cancel its annual 5-day event for the first time in its 51-year history. I know people are depressed, disappointed, upset… but considering how every summer SDCC becomes a 133,000-population Petri dish regardless of a coronavirus (Darlene and I get sick about every third year post-con), I can’t even imagine how many people would be exposed to Covid-19. Due to my congenital asthma, I probably have less than a 50-50 shot at surviving a full-blown case.

I haven’t missed a SDCC since my first year attending in 1983; one year I only managed the last 3 hours on a Sunday but hey admission was like $6 and I got the souvenir book. I’d be absolutely ruined (emotionally) if I couldn’t make it due to illness or some other conflict (I blew off my 20-year class reunion because of SDCC)… but this year I’m just sad that so many people had to scuttle plans for this show, the largest of its kind in the U.S. And I really feel for my fellow professionals who rely on comic-conventions to make a living. For me, it’s officially a side hustle though I won’t sugar-coat it, I’ll definitely miss the income exhibiting at SDCC provides each year.

The last convention I exhibited at was San Diego Comic Fest in March, and it seems like last year TBH. I had hand sanitizer at my table, people were semi-jokingly greeting each other with elbow bumps and people were sharing news of other conventions/events across the U.S. that were being canceled (WonderCon, Emerald City Comic Con, SXSW, Burning Man, concerts, monster truck pulls, campaign rallies, etc.). The salad days.

A month later, the folks at SDCC announced their cancellation of the 2020 show, though they thought up a Plan B— a virtual comic-con you can attend from your home computer or mobile device. I haven’t seen it in action yet, but apparently you’ll be able to wander through the convention floor and explore exhibitors’ tables and booths as you would in real life. And it won’t cost a nickel to attend.

Not 100% certain how this Comic-Con@Home will translate to buying Cool Jerk books and merchandise from yours truly, but I think once you come to my “table” in Small Press, K-9, you’ll be able to link to my website and online store. From there, I think you can order my goods and I’ll ship them out (or maybe do a safe in-person delivery if you’re a local). As ever, I’ll personalize books to you and include a quickie character sketch.

This virtual comic-con will run today (Wednesday) through Sunday, July 26. I hope you’ll swing by between Zoom panels, YouTube programming, webinars, cosplay live-feeds and virtual awards ceremonies.

This summer just won’t feel the same without the annual pilgrimage to the San Diego Convention Center, loading in and setting up the Cool Jerk table, catching up with my friends, sharing war stories with fellow exhibitors, meeting (and making) new fans of Cool Jerk and Doc Splatter, stalking my mentors, having chance encounters with comics celebrities, buying that one item you can’t get anywhere else, “swimming through the sweaty rivers of meat” (i.e. the crowds) in order to explore the convention, laughing until I’m hoarse, having the traditional Saturday night downtown dinner with Darlene, taking photos of mind-blowing cosplay and exclusive merchandise, getting as-it-happens updates and scuttlebutt from the movie studios, the inevitable projectile vomiting (not necessarily from me)….

sigh.

Thanks for reading, thanks for coming by (virtually) and thanks for helping to support the independent creators. Darlene and I will miss you all terribly, but we’ll make up for it next year. Now be safe and go have fun!

San Diego Comic-Con 2019 was kind to Cool Jerk, despite me spraining my back a few days before the show and being in teeth-gritting agony most days. New items this year included The Mightily Marvelous Cool Jerk Fun Book (my legit first and only all-ages publication) and something I called the Official Cool Jerk Mystery Funbag, a blind box-style lootsack with roughly $80 of Cool Jerk merch for a mere $30. I had hidden behind the table a select few of the three-volume Like, For Shore! The Complete Works college strip collections. These were limited to 75 editions and I literally had them under wraps and off the table because they were made especially for Cool Jerk patrons who have all the books. (Also available to the general public via my Cool Jerk store, here!)

This was my 17th year in a row exhibiting in Small Press, in pretty much the exact same spot. What’s mind-blowing is that a bunch of high school kids I met that first year in 2003 (The Poway Posse) are now the same age I was when I met them! As ever, it was great to see so many of my friends and meet new ones. Special thanks to Nathan, Ricky and his nephew Brandon, and Richard’s pal Alex for helping me with table stuff this year.

Now, on with the show!

Here’s our doggo, Doctor, charming attendees outside Hall B. (The top photo is also him, cosplaying as Doctor Strange.)

Timely and popular cosplay pairs this year include Thanos and Death…

… and Thanos with youngster Gamora.

Also popular this year were various takes from “Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse.” Especially Spider-Gwen (aka Ghost Spider) and warmup-sweats-wearing Peter Parker.

Saw this same dude at Denver Pop Culture Con earlier this summer, also cosplaying Madcap.

Sort of a casual-Friday-meets-hipster version of Thundercats’ Cheetara.

I confess I have no idea who she’s cosplaying. Anyone?

For all you European readers, here’s Obelisk and Asterisk. Nice job!

Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. The wardrobe and hair were on point; the fact he stayed in character (gait, exaggerated pantomiming) was just gravy.

Brianna Turnier as Jubilee (non-vampire version because she left her fangs at home). Her hands did give off bright lights, despite the photo.

Me, with a Damage Control employee and Taskmaster. Wish I’d gotten a full-figure pic of Taskmaster; George Pérez would’ve been honored.

PRO TIP: Try to call out a cosplayer by their character name when asking for pics or selfies. They love that. I was able to get Arachne‘s attention by calling out “Excuse me… Julia Carpenter? Can I get a pic with you?”

XY chromosome version of She-Ra and a non-barefoot Fred Flintstone (with bonus Dino).

I’m… not certain who they are, but they’re terrific. Anone throw me a bone here?

Simon Williams a.k.a. Wonder Man. No safari jacket? Well, I can’t blame him. It was pretty warm and humid that weekend.

An above-average Felicia Hardy a.k.a. Black Cat.

Another Marvel couple— Havok and Polaris.

Bellatrix Lestrange and Voldemort. His wand fu was exceptional.

I wasn’t able to sneak away from the Cool Jerk table except for the few minutes before the show opens each day, but I was able to see the actual (?) prop of the Oxygen Destroyer from the first Godzilla movie, Gojira (1954). Also in the frame are one of King Ghidora‘s heads and a small-size Mothra larvae.

And I was also able to get a sweet, up-close pic of the actual Godzilla 2000 suit, also part of the Toho Pictures display.

Onto the Cool Jerk table itself. Here are a couple versions of my Cool Jerk enamel pins, where each pin comes with an original drawing on the backing board. These were both snatched up before the day ended.

This particular Cool Jerk Canvas Panel sold like gangbusters. In fact…

…this knot of Handmaids purchased the last one I had at the show. If you’d like one for yourself, buzz me (contact information at the top of the page) and order one up!

Totally unrelated to the previous photos, here are longtime pals Sean and Lacie. I was surprised they made it, what with Lacie being due pretty much two weeks after the ‘con. I think their not-quite-ready-for-the-world daughter cosplaying as the Death Star is adorable.

Also coming by the table are Mason and Pamela. I think I’ve known Mason at least 10 years and Pamela had just cleaned off her cosplay…

…as Pennywise. (FULL DISCLOSURE: This pic of Pamela, promoting the “IT!” board game, was not taken by me.)

Our cartoonist buddy Abby Denson (Dolltopia) came by and got to catch up a bit with Darlene.

Sorry, folks— another one I don’t recognize. Anyone…?

My cosplay of the day winner was this rather dark version of Ariel…

…and the following day I had to give it to Vlad Dracul.

OK I’m officially old. No, not because I turned 50 (!) since last year’s San Diego Comic-Con International (map below). Not because this is Cool Jerk’s 17th consecutive year in Small Press. But because I sprained my back carrying some of the tablescape out of storage (seen above). PRO TIP: don’t sprain your back. If anyone asks you “hey, wanna sprain your back?” Just remember my advice and kindly decline.

Pain and limited mobility aside, just because I’m taking a sabbatical from the weekly comic doesn’t mean I’m not bringing new, fun stuff to the show!

First and foremost is The Mightily Marvelous Cool Jerk Fun Book! It’s my first all-ages product, if you can believe that. *looks through archive, believes it* It’s a magazine-sized laugh-maker filled with puzzles, games, mazes and other fun stuff. A mere $7. (Later this year will be volume 2, which will be most-ages. Stay tuned!)

Also this year I have a special product— the official Cool Jerk Mystery Funbag! Anyone remember the Happy Happy Funbags from the mid-2000s? Well, it’s like that Funbag had a baby with a Lootcrate and voilà! It’s a blind buy, but guaranteed in each Funbag is one random Cool Jerk book, Doc Splatter Ominous Omnibus, a Cool Jerk T-shirt, Fridge Bling (Cool Jerk magnet— brand new!), a Cool Jerk window decal, stickers, Post-Its, a random Canvas Panel… and a heap of other stuff! Limited to 15 Funbags, this is a once-in-a-decade opportunity to quickly catch up on Cool Jerk swag or take care of that special someone’s birthday or Christmas gift. Easily a $70+ value, but only $30. Sorry, online folks— I can’t really ship this out without adding a dumb amount of postage.

I still have a limited quantity of Like, For Shore! The Complete Works. It’s three volumes collecting more than 170 college-era strips that preceded Cool Jerk. Armpit, Puppy and the rest of the Spittle Beach gang are all there, and I remastered nearly every strip in graphite. The first printing is in a very limited run of 75 signed and numbered copies, and most are gone. Sold as a set, $18.

Like every year I added some new Canvas Panel designs, which I’ll Tweet during the show (find me on Twitter: @cooljerk). I also reprinted a stack of old favorites that always seem to sell out. $15 a pop, or $40 if you want a long-form canvas (contains a whole strip, not just one panel), which I can custom-make for you if you order one up in person or online.

I have a limited supply of last year’s runaway hit, the Cool Jerk Enamel Pins. They’re $10 and you get one-of-a-kind original art with each pin. Choose among the Cool word balloon, Jerk thought balloon and/or the ubiquitous CENSORED bar… perfect for any jacket, backpack or tongue piercing!

Attendees will also find The Girl Who Kicked The Donut Habit (Darlene’s second comic) and the Jerkopædia (Official Style Guide to Cool Jerk), both of which I’ll have on hand in limited supply. Also running a bit low on T-shirts, but I’ll bring what I have.

And last but not least, here’s a convenient map I whipped up while sucking down some CBD.

Hope to see you at the show!

San Diego Comic-Con 2018 has come and gone, like a peyote-fueled fever dream, leaving in its wake tens of thousands of sweat-covered popular arts fans/aficionados who either spent a lot of money or made a lot of money. Individual results may vary, but it was a fine year for Cool Jerk. Fine, I tell you. I had a secret product: the three-volume collection of my long-rumored “Like, For Shore!” college strips. These were limited to 75 editions and I literally had them under wraps and off the table because they were made especially for Cool Jerk patrons who have all the books. So a bunch of you SDCC attendees had first crack at these college strips that begat Cool Jerk, and now I’m happy to announce they’re available for the general public via my Cool Jerk store, here!

It was terrific to see so many of you, year after year. Some I’ve known for decades, some in just the last year or two. And I met a fair chunk of new readers who I’m sure to see in the years ahead. Thank you so much for coming by my little island in the middle of the convention center. Now, it’s time for the photo recap!

Let’s start with Kolchak the night stalker. Obscure if you’re younger than 60, a mandatory Google search if you’re younger than 45.

Another obscure cosplay, Artemus Gordon and James West, from Salma Hayek’s best movie.

Here’s Matt and Jess, from their Netflix shows.

Also courtesy Netflix, here’s Luke Cage.

Delightful StormPixxieCosplay (her Instagram handle) cosplaying Teen Titan Raven.

Just not a comic convention without a slave Leia, but hey! Props to the mail-order inflatable Jabba costume!

And if you’re going to cosplay Storm of the X-Men, you’ve just gotta use white contact lenses. Just gotta.

Speaking of Storm, there’s another one in the background there, behind the Grandmaster and Topaz (both as seen in “Thor: Ragnarok”).

Here I am with fellow Reno alum Mary Crawley, who remembers my comics from the days of UNR Sagebrush and the Reno Gazette-Journal. We discovered that we had a mutual friend in Bob Adams, and sadly I had to tell her of Bob’s suicide in 2013.

Here’s my new buddy @KariLikeSafari wearing a t-shirt that says “Impeach Trump”… in Gallifreyan.

Victorian sexy time with Mina Murray and Vlad Dracula.

Catwoman and Zatanna picked up a couple Cool Jerk books, and the next thing I knew they were casing a dude’s hand-made jewelry and artworks two tables down.

Mrs. Waterford read one of my Cool Jerk collections last night. Oops. #spoilers

Damn. Here’s “Sherman” Tank (his name, really) as John Coffey from “The Green Mile.” Complete with mouse.

Not certain what their official cosplay names are, but that’s a Wasp/Jolibee mashup with Grimace/Thanos. With the Infinity Oven Mitt. Of course.

While Darlene was wandering around the floor, she spotted the Mystery Science Theater 3000 family…

…a Dora Milaje (“Black Panther”) and Michonne (“The Walking Dead”)…

…Erik Killmonger and Shuri (both from “Black Panther”)…

…and a female Magneto, plus Mystique in mid-morph.

From Hulu’s original series “GLOW,” here’s Zoya the Destroya!

If not the first Snake Plissken I’ve seen… certainly the best Snake Plissken I’ve seen.

In the parking garage, X-Men Psylocke and Colossus (apparently his nickname even out of costume, if you catch what I’m sayin’).

One of the best costumes of the show. Bravo to you, King of the Pink Panther tribe.

Here’s Gambit and Phoenix, the latter possessed by symbiote Venom. I wish the photo would do her justice, but VenomPhoenix had super-sharp shark teeth.

Long-time pal, journalistic colleague and breakfast buddy Lisa O’Malley somehow got past security to visit. CALL SECURITY!

Think I’ll wrap this up with a couple adorbz cosplayers. The first is She-Hulk, with what her mom says is “her favorite fighting pose”…

…and lil’ clown Pennywise (I’ll remind you of last year’s Georgie Denbrough). Horror clearly has no age limit.

This year is the sixteenth consecutive year that Cool Jerk set up shop in Small Press at San Diego Comic-Con International (map below). The weather forecast says it’ll be muggy with a chance of drenched armpits. And that’s INSIDE the convention center!

This year I have a special treat for all of you who have the complete Cool Jerk library: Like, For Shore! The Complete Works. It’s three volumes collecting more than 170 college-era strips that preceded Cool Jerk. Armpit, Puppy and the rest of the Spittle Beach gang are all there, and I remastered nearly every strip in graphite. The first printing is in a very limited run of 75 signed and numbered copies, and San Diego Comic-Con attendees will have first crack at buying them. Sold as a set, $18.

Also new this year will be a few new Canvas Panel designs, which I’ll Tweet during the show (find me on Twitter: @cooljerk). I also reprinted a stack of old favorites that always seem to sell out. $15 a pop, or $40 if you want a long-form canvas (contains a whole strip, not just one panel), which I can custom-make for you if you order one up in person or online.

I have a limited supply of last year’s runaway hit, the Cool Jerk Enamel Pins. They’re $10 and you get one-of-a-kind original art with each pin. Choose among the Cool word balloon, Jerk thought balloon and/or the ubiquitous CENSORED bar… perfect for any jacket, backpack or tongue piercing!

This year, I want to try something new. It could be awesome, it could be a giant mistake. If you’re reading this mailer and attending Comic-Con, ask about the Cool Jerk BOOK DEAL. It’s on the down-low; I’m not going to advertise it. But ask about the BOOK DEAL. Seriously. It’s totally worth it.

Also worth mentioning are The Girl Who Kicked The Donut Habit (Darlene’s second comic) and the Jerkopædia (Official Style Guide to Cool Jerk), both of which I’ll have on hand. Also running a bit low on t-shirts, but I’ll bring what I have.

Here’s a locator for your convenience. Thanks for following Cool Jerk and hope to see you at the show!

Was it the lack of a kidney stone (and accompanying stents)? Was it the oppressive humidity? Was it the sobering reality that a sentient sack of spray-tanned dicks is running this country? Dunno, but this year’s San Diego Comic-Con felt like an ode to the best of previous years. This was the first time since 2003 that the Cool Jerk table wasn’t in Small Press K-10… we moved next door to the K-9 corner spot. Woo-hoo!

Sales were tremendous; lots of people — friends and new faces alike — came by the table to chat or buy the newly unveiled Cool Jerk Enamel Pins (limited run of 100 per design), each of which came bagged with an original penciled-and-inked drawing of a favorite Cool Jerk character. Canvas Panels did well, with the”Chupacabraccino” and “Trump is a literal bag of dicks” panels selling out instantly. I discovered that my Cool Jerk T-shirt inventory is running thin in some sizes, and as a result I lost a few potential sales. (MEMO TO SELF: Make more panels and T-shirts!)

Sincere gratitude to everyone who squeezed in a visit (and purchase) into their comic-con schedule, and to Darlene who manned the table, kept us fed and hydrated, and brought our doggy downtown to experience his first comic-con (see below).

As the recently passed June Foray would famously say, “And now here’s something we hope you’ll really like!”

Starting off with another Twin Peaks selfie, because #peaksfreak. This was taken the day before the convention opened, during set-up. SHHH! DON’T TELL ANYONE!!

Stranger Things 2 building wrap, seen in the Gaslamp Quarter a block-and-a-half from the convention center. Netflix was really pushing their original content, incl. The Defenders.

Of course, HBO’s Game of Thrones had a big presence. I wonder what was inside this crate?

Our dog, The Doctor, cosplayed as Doctor Strange (complete with Eye of Agamotto and custom-made Cape of Levitation). Here he is wowing the paparazzi outside Hall B. At one point I think he was trending on Twitter. We thought he’d wig the F out but he took it all in stride, sometimes letting people pet his head or give high-fives.

Traffic in front of our row in Small Press always includes a lot of cosplayers. Here’s Nightwing, Batgirl and Deadpool.

Here’s Spider-Man, Black Cat and Ted Washington (our super-chill and talented table neighbor for two years running).

As always, sketches are 100% free. Here’s a reader who picked up another Cool Jerk book (working his way through my library) and an enamel pin.

Hawkgirl, here, with expanding and contracting wings plus a glowing mace. Her similarly costumed partner Hawkman was elsewhere on the floor.

Here’s a Bob Ross cosplayer, proving the Cosplay Well of Ideas in bottomless.

You can call her Laura, you can call her X-23, you can even call her the all-new Wolverine… just don’t call her before she’s had her coffee.

Jennifer Walters, better known as She-Hulk. Always a popular cosplay option, and aside from the non-green tummy, she nailed it.

Wish I’d gotten some video of Lil the Dancer (“Twin Peaks- Fire Walk With Me”). She got the blinking, puckering, stepping in place and hand gestures down pat. “She’s my mother’s sister’s girl.”

Spooky stuff coming next. Let’s float with Georgie Denbrough (“IT”)…

…and beg for mercy from Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees and Leatherface.

Very well done Kim Possible…

…maybe second only to Carrie Kelley Robin, here.

No, that’s not “female Venom” — that’s the Julia Carpenter version of Spider-Woman (aka Arachne). Cosplayers love it when you ID them properly and get their alter egos correct.

Along with the Scooby Gang (up top), this might be my favorite cosplay team-up: Gogo Yubari and her death ball & chain from “Kill Bill.”

Wandering the floor, Darlene and I came across J. Jonah Jameson (publisher of The Daily Bugle)…

…an on-point Mystique (forget the scaly Jennifer Lawrence versions)…

…and Red Sonja holding a decapitated head with an iPhone embedded in the skull. Crazy world.

Initially thought the gal on the left was Deathbird, but the costume details say she’s a female (and feather-heavy) variant of Magneto. Next to her is the queen of the Inhumans, Medusa.

Speaking of Inhumans, Marvel had a life-size Lockjaw on display. Such hugs!

People just love doggies, I guess. Even when they’re so cute they make you want to tear your own face off.

Darlene spotted this kid cosplaying Dustin from Stranger Things and nearly got whiplash from the double take. Bravo!

This would be the first and only Bebop & Rocksteady from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles I’ve seen.

Also, The Maker (evil Reed Richards from another dimension) scores points for obscurity and originality.

While working the table, Darlene handed off a Cool Jerk book to actual-size Ant-Man. THIS IS NOT FORCED PERSPECTIVE HE REALLY WAS SEVEN INCHES TALL I SWEAR.

Offered without commentary.

“Hey, Moon Knight… can you tell me who just called?” “What’s the matter, Daredevil… you blind or something?” *awkward silence*

Here’s a brief crossplay round-up: female versions of Gambit and Spider-Man, in both conventional and “Iron Spider” outfits.

And while I’d thought this was a Hayley Atwell-inspired Peggy Carter/Captain America mashup, Pandora Grayson told me she’s actually a 1940s-era female Captain America.

Longtime friends John & Charlene came by the table again this year, no doubt an overwhelming experience for everyone.

Here’s a Frank Frazetta painting come to life. All that was missing was a knife-swinging protagonist and a nude girl.

And as luck would have it (?), a nude girl did show up a few minutes later. Yes, that’s body paint and a thong… nothing else. I decided to try out my Cool Jerk “CENSORED” enamel pin.

Today begins Cool Jerk’s 15th straight year exhibiting at San Diego Comic-Con International. Come find us in Small Press (K9), right next to the same spot we’ve had since 2003. Got some new stuff, some old favorites, and some ridonkulous, show-only deals on Cool Jerk books (see above)!

We’ve been thinking of doing Cool Jerk Enamel Pins for a couple years now (originally thinking of Velcro patches to wear on hats or sew onto backpacks), but this year we’re debuting the first three designs. They’re really spiff! Most places sell enamel pins for $10, and I’m no exception… but do they include ORIGINAL ARTWORK with each pin? Yep— each backing board has a drawing by yours truly! Choose from pre-drawn ones or request a special someone! Each one is a limited print run of 100 and when they’re gone, they’re gone. SPECIAL ‘CON DEAL: Buy all three, get a book for free!

We still have copies of last summer’s The Girl Who Kicked The Donut Habit, the follow up to 2012’s The Girl With The Donut Tattoo which sold out after three printings. It’s another venture into Darlene’s food-centric world, and pays homage to her mom who passed away unexpectedly in 2014. It’s 24 color pages of comics, recipes, a centerfold (?!?) and costs six bucks with $1 of each sale benefiting the Colon Cancer Alliance. Be sure to get one from Darlene directly so she can sign it for you!

I’m kind of burning through my limited run of Jerkopædia— The Official Visual Style Guide to Cool Jerk, the MUST-HAVE for fans of Cool Jerk (or comic strips in general), character design and animation model sheets. And it’s much more than just fun drawings… it’s fun drawings WITH ANNOTATIONS! Find out who walks around commando! Discover the secret of Armpit’s feet! When was Arms-Over-Head Guy’s first appearance? This guide has it all AND MUCH MORE. It’s 24 pages, professionally printed with a heavy stock color cover, six bucks.

Folks just love Canvas Panels and I’ll be debuting several more varieties at the show! How about a panel depicting a Human Centipede diagram? Or the Chupacabraccino?? A mere $15 a pop for hand-sized artwork, suitable for any room in the house!

Further on that, I’m also selling a few Long-form Cool Jerk Canvases of some fan-favorite strips! They’re $35 each, which is surprisingly the most expensive item at the table. Don’t see your personal favorite? I’ll also be taking orders at the table, which I can then ship out for free!

We’ll also have all the other items you could ever possibly want:

• All Cool Jerk books, and they’re discounted for the show! Get ’em here, get ’em signed and avoid shipping fees!
• T-shirts in a variety of styles, fits (M or F) and sizes! All shirts are $15-$20. CHEAP!
• Stickers, buttons and the like!
• As ever, sketches are free!

Here’s a map I made while you were binge-watching “Glow.” To recap, we’re right next to the same spot we’ve always been, Small Press K9, a stone’s throw from the communal baths/vomitorium/emergency cosplay repair stations.

Find us on Twitter — @cooljerk and @darleneeats. We’ll be live-Tweeting throughout!

See you there!

This was the “off year.”

Remember last year’s San Diego Comic-Con photo recap where I mentioned the kidney stone? Well, I still have it and at this writing I have two stents inside me, connecting my kidneys with my bladder. They were placed in May in order to facilitate a subsequent procedure (scheduled for next week) to remove the Rice Krispie-sized pellet of calcified crystals/crystalized calcium. The stone itself doesn’t hurt; it’s just camping out like a hibernating grizzly bear. It’s the stents that are very uncomfortable and made worse when I walk around. This will no doubt make for a terrific Cool Jerk story line somewhere down the road, judging by the reactions of friends who asked how I was doing. I was off my game, unable to actively (or hyperactively) engage with fans, friends and the Cool Jerk-curious. I had to stay sitting at the table, more or less, for the whole show. Darlene did what she could to pick up the slack, but regardless, sales suffered accordingly.

That being said, it was still terrific to exhibit in the same spot since 2003 and see old friends and make new ones. Having one down year out of 14 is not bad, but it was sobering. Darlene and I outlined an attack plan for the next 12 months, which we’re calling “Cool Jerk’s Counterattack.” Stay tuned!

Thanks to everyone who came by the table to buy some Cool Jerk ephemera/effluvia or just to say hi. Much appreciated! And now, onto the sideshow:

Let’s start with one of my few walkabout opportunities. The owls are not what they seem.

Here I am at the table, with Darlene’s second comic — The Girl Who Kicked The Donut Habit — in hand.

The back of the new book. Notice Darlene’s matching fingernails.

Here’s Darlene and Eric (both wearing awesome Cool Jerk tees) playing that goddamn Pokéymon Go game. LIKE EVERYONE ELSE ON THE ‘CON FLOOR.

Not to be outdone, here are my friends John & Charlene, who also geared up with some Cool Jerk tees! (I’ve known Char for 35+ years. In fact, she drove her brother Jim and me to our very first San Diego comic-cons in 1983 and 1984.)

Also swinging by the table were the dapper and delightful duo “Eva Halloween” (cosplaying Poison Ivy) & “Boy Drinks World.” You might remember Eva and Doc Splatter joined forces in Oct. 2013 to cross-promote each other’s websites.

So let’s have Poison Ivy escort us to this year’s cosplayer gallery:

Right off the bat we have “Barbie Deadpool.” (Plus Zombie Snow White for good measure.)

Jemm! No sign of the Holograms, however.

Couple of friends (Aubree & Brenan) as Mystery Science Theater 3000. Their creativity is on point.

Thinking outside of the box, here’s a creative cosplayer as Spider-Man 2099. Meanwhile, Darlene is letting this awesomeness sink in.

Remember Danny Phantom on Nickelodeon? I certainly did.

Darlene got this pic of the Bob’s Burgers booth. Note the Ash vs. Evil Dead bag. I WONDER WHAT’S INSIDE.

Speaking of Ash vs. Evil Dead, this interactive photo booth was either promoting that show or the adjacent Fear The Walking Dead.

Time for some mash-ups. Here’s Ronald McThor Odinson with his enchanted hammer, Happy Mealjolnir.

Scarily closer to reality than I like to imagine, here’s… well, you know.

Amazon with a Las Vegas flavor, here’s Wonder Showgirl! (I’m in the background Googling this for verification.)

What’s a comic-con without some cross-play? Here’s the female version of Dr. Strange.

Here’s the best X-Wing Pilot I’ve seen at any comic-con, ever!

I did not see any other stranded castaways.

Shag was nowhere to be seen, either.

Darlene was lucky to catch the Juggernaut busting out of Exhibit Hall A.

Also, fine renditions of Spider-Gwen and Doctor Doom.

Here’s bodypaint fanatic Todd Schmidt as Iceman, founding member of the X-Men…

…and here he is as Silver Surfer.

This gal’s Jubilee game was strong!

Refreshing to see the comics versions of Vision and Hawkeye (opposed to the Marvel Cinematic Universe ones).

This one’s kind of a mind-bender: on the left is Jessica Jones (watch the Netflix series) and on the right is Jessica Jones’ short-lived alter ego, Jewel.

Here’s Marvel’s C.B. Cebulski and Darlene, before they wandered off to talk about the San Diego food scene, comics and whatnot.

I always try to find a cool Batgirl, and this year’s is courtesy LEGO.

Saving the best cosplay for last, here are two gals as crossplay Captain America and a tauntaun…

…and the next day they cosplayed as a line of dialogue from one of my favorite movies, The Silence of the Lambs. We have Jane Gumb/Buffalo Jill with the quote “It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.” And on the right, the bottle of lotion IN the basket with Buffalo Jill’s doggie, Precious. Insane! They were really funny and embodied the best aspects of comic-con and cosplayers.