With apologies to Martin Gore, here’s my review of “The Woman in Black” (2012) in song form (to the melody of Depeche Mode’s “Dressed in Black”):
“The Woman in Black” is on
That Harry Potter kid has gone
Gone to the dreary town
Where every kid is gone
I think each one is dead
Cause of the Woman in Black
This movie is eerily
Just like Downton Abbey
Except that everybody
Hates it when Harry’s nosy
Nosing around Eel Marsh
Home of the Woman in Black
Harry’s got a picture of himself
A picture by Harry’s kid
A drawing of them
A drawing of a train
And it telegraphs the end
When they’re hit by a train
When Harry sees her again
The Woman in Black again
This movie is atmospheric
How should The Doc rate it
Mrs. Doc Splatter fears it
She doesn’t like spirits
Exhumed mud-covered boys
Or Victorian-Era toys
The Woman in Black A minus