Phoenix Comicon is bagged and tagged and in the rear view mirror. It was a pretty odd show. It lasted three days (Fri.-Sun.) with a three-hour preview on Thursday night. Without getting into the grim, tear-inducing specifics, Team Cool Jerk almost pulled up stakes Friday night and called it quits.

I’ve done three-hour store signings that made 20 times — and that’s NOT an exaggeration — the amount of sales as Thursday and Friday brought in. When Friday wrapped, I asked myself, “What the hell? Does Phoenix not LIKE comics?” I knew it wasn’t Cool Jerk-specific, as I talked with other creators/exhibitors who considered every gimmick short of performing handstands (or sexual favors) to make a sale. It was more like a junior-high super-kawaii Halloween cosplay cutegasm hugfest than it was a convention for comics fans. (Comics fans with wallets, that is.)

Saturday arrived and immediately a dude ran up to my booth and exclaimed “OH MY GOD! COOL JERK! YOU ARE MY HERO!” That was pretty startling, but, alas, no sale was made. I gave Darlene the “let’s pack up the Subaru and go looking for Gila Monsters” look, but shortly afterward, a dude named Ron came up and bought a book. Then Josh and Rochelle. Then Adam. Then Bastion and Brad, who each bought two books. Tiffany remembered me from 2006 and bought both Cool Jerk volumes. Others came by and bought my t-shirts, buttons, stickers. Saturday ended up being pretty decent. We decided to hang around through Sunday.

Sunday mirrored Saturday with brisk sales and lots of activity. Thanks to Ben, Stephen, Daniel, Tyler and others who also patronized my table, joined the subscriber list and/or made the day worthwhile.

All tallied up, Phoenix ended up being a better show in two days than either Emerald City or WonderCon. Come to find out, the dude who stormed my table on Saturday morning was the boyfriend of a long-time Cool Jerk reader, Jamie (she became a subscriber at the 2006 show). She meant to come by but was either too busy with convention duties or was repelled by the manhole cover-sized splash of puke from Saturday afternoon. Sorry I missed you, Jamie!

Will I do Phoenix again? Hmm. I’ll have to think about it. Phoenix was a valuable lesson that no two shows are alike. I needed to adapt on the fly to accommodate attendees and pique their curiosities. Darlene suggested maybe I need to do some strips with Yuri in a milkmaid cosplay uniform so I can sell tiny hats with lace glued to them next year. =:^)

It could have been the sweltering Phoenix heat with temperatures hitting the triple digits. Maybe it was the milk maid accessories housed immediately next to my booth. It might’ve been the illo of Seashelly Dumpster on the Cool Jerk banner behind my table. Whatever the reason, Cool Jerk was quarantined temporarily Saturday afternoon. Someone called didn’t make it to the big white telephone to call Ralph and instead dropped a round-trip meal ticket right there in the middle of the aisle, closing traffic for part of the afternoon.

Fortunately, this reversal of fortune didn’t affect the many people who came out on Sunday and stopped by the table — many of whom are now new fans and friends of Cool Jerk.

Updates on the Cactus Comicon to come later this week!

By overwhelming demand, Team Cool Jerk will be returning to Phoenix Comicon, Thursday-Sunday (May 27-30) at the Phoenix Convention Center! This marks my second time at the “Cactus ‘Con” and I’m looking forward to kicking it with you loyal subscribers from 2006, plus indoctrinating thousands of new readers into the Cool Jerk posse! I’ll have all my books (didn’t have ’em in ’06), plus lovely new T-shirts (in mens’ and womens’ fits) and other stuff you can’t possibly live without!

Since my checks evidently didn’t bounce, I can now share the official schedule of Cool Jerk comic-con appearances in 2010 (so far; Cool Jerk may attend a ‘con or two later in the year. Any suggestions?):

Emerald City ComiCon • Seattle
March 13 & 14
Cool Jerk’s second ‘con appearance in the land of Twin Peaks, coffee conglomerates and sasquatches.

WonderCon • San Francisco
April 2-4
Fourth year in a row! Look for Team Cool Jerk in the same spot as always (Artists Alley, across from the Furries yiff pile)!

Phoenix Comicon • Phoenix
May 27-30
Delighted to be back for the first time since 2006!

Comic-Con International • San Diego
July 21-25
Eight years in a row, in the same spot as always (Small Press K10, next to the restrooms and vomitorium)!

So mark your calendars, put in vacation time, book those flights and bring your wallets!

This Saturday and Sunday (Sept. 23 & 24) I’ll be in lovely Phoenix, tabling at the Cactus Comicon! For more info on the show, go HERE!

Kind of short notice, I know, but I figure that A) if you’re already going to the ‘Con, then you’re already going to the ‘Con, and B) I’m probably not going to be the deal-maker in getting you to the ‘Con. But hey — if you’re within a couple-hour drive of Phoenix this weekend, do go to the show and swing by the Small Press Area/Artists’ Alley. I understand we’ll be outside of the main exhibit hall where we won’t embarrass the other pros and dealers. i.e. the parking lot in 110-degree heat.

Come on by and buy my wares, like the official Cool Jerk Happy Happy Funbags, T-shirts, button packs, and other zany crap. Undoubtedly, Arizona will be the next toehold in Cool Jerk’s inevitable conquering of the world!